omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
Randomize