If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize