Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize