i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Randomize