do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
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