What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
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