If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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