So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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