break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
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