Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
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