How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Randomize
