i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Randomize
