I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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