Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
You need a sexual gate keeper
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
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