Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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