his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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