How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
