Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
21 Awkward Ways People Found Out Their Partner Was Into Outrageous Sex Acts
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.