That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
oh god the rape fog is back!
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
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is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
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Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
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