Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
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