Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
