I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
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