Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
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