he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
