He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Randomize
