question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
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