just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
