i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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