Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Randomize