explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
