girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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