Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
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