There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize