Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Panties = found
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
