I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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