OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Randomize