I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
Randomize
