I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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