there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
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