Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
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