it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
27 Parents Confess Shocking Secrets Their Kids Don’t Know
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes