guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Randomize
