piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Randomize
