There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
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i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
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