I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Randomize
