is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
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