What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Randomize