can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
