Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Randomize
