I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize
