so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
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