that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
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